Merry Christmas in NYC - Alone...I think???
The other day I had the opportunity to talk with my mother....which hasn't happened in a very long time. My mother is one of my dearest friends in the world..and because of me choosing to take a stand on something that my family didn't agree with I now feel such a distance from all of them. I love my family...I love them with all of my heart and that will never change.
As I was speaking to my mother I could hear the hurt in her voice...it saddened me...for now a conversation on what seperates us will and must be something that will be discussed in the future. I understand why my family believes the way they do...I love them for that...it is our religious beliefs that I continue to find that centers me and brings me peace.
I have questioned often where my religious understanding is...am I truly religious...or am I simply just walking the path. That is my goal this upcoming year...to search that out for myself..and truly find peace....if it is possible in my life.
So....due to financial difficulties...sadly I am finding myself in a bind...and have decided that I will be staying home during the holidays. It is a difficult time for all of us...no matter where you are in this world. And because it is easier to stay here in the city and work and make money...I am choosing to do so. Will I be spending it alone...who knows....probably not...I most likely wont even realize that I am missing out on the holidays...since I will be working both Christmas eve and Christmas morning - LUCKY ME!
I plan on getting back to this blog before Christmas actually happens...however, if I do not...I just want to wish each everyone a Happy Holidays...and for those who are jewish...Happy Hannuka today.